Things To Tell Yourself to Boost Self-Esteem

The opinion we have of ourselves is referred to as self-esteem. We generally feel good about ourselves and life when we have robust self-esteem. It improves our ability to cope with life’s ups and downs. So many obstacles might come your way; your self-esteem might be stamped on, but brace up and tell yourself things that will encourage you.


We tend to see ourselves and our lives negatively and critically when our self-esteem is low. We also believe we are less capable of meeting life’s obstacles when we have low self-esteem. You can read on to know what you can do to boost your self-esteem.


What factors contribute to low self-esteem?


Low self-esteem is common in children. Our instructors, friends, siblings, parents, and even the media send positive and negative messages about us. The message that you are not good enough is the one that sticks with you for some reason. Perhaps it was tough for you to meet other people’s expectations. Self-esteem can be harmed by stress and tough life events such as major sickness or loss. Personality is also a factor. Some people are more prone to negative thinking, while others hold themselves to impossible standards.


What are the consequences of poor self-esteem?

You may withdraw from others if you have low self-esteem or confidence. You might stop trying exciting experiences and avoid things you find difficult. Avoiding demanding and difficult events may make you feel protected in the short term. This can backfire in the long run since it strengthens your underlying doubts and anxieties. It instils the unhelpful belief that avoiding problems is the only way to deal. Low self-esteem can harm your mental health and lead to issues like sadness and anxiety. You may develop detrimental behaviours such as smoking and drinking excessively as a coping mechanism.


Things to say to yourself to boost your Self-esteem

You must first identify and then fight your negative self-perceptions to improve your self-esteem. For example, you can tell yourself that you’re “too foolish” to apply for a new job or that “nobody cares” about you.


  1. Start writing down your negative ideas on paper or in a diary. Consider when you initially began to have these thoughts.


  1. Start writing evidence that contradicts these negative assumptions, such as “I’m particularly brilliant” or “Every week, my sister calls for a conversation.” Other good qualities to write down include “I’m thoughtful,” “I’m a fantastic cook,” and “I’m someone whom others trust.” Also, provide some complimentary remarks from others.


  1. Aim to have at least five positive things on your list and add to it regularly. Then put your list somewhere you can see it. That way, you can keep reminding yourself that you’re OK. You might have low confidence now because of what happened when you were growing up, but you can grow and develop new ways of seeing yourself at any age.


Other ways to improve low self-esteem

Some other simple techniques may help you feel better about yourself.


  1. Recognise what you’re good at

We’re all good at something, whether it’s cooking, singing, doing puzzles or being a friend. We also tend to enjoy doing the things we’re good at, which can help boost our mood.


  1. Build positive relationships

If you find certain people tend to bring you down, try to spend less time with them, or tell them how you feel about their words or actions.

Please list at least five positive things and add to them regularly. Then post your list somewhere visible. You can keep reminding yourself that you’re OK this way.


  1. Recognize your strengths

You may lack confidence now as a result of events from your childhood, but we can all evolve and create new perspectives on ourselves at any age. We’re all talented in some ways, whether it’s cooking, singing, solving puzzles, or simply being friends. We also like doing what we’re good at, which can help lift our spirits.


  1. Be assertive

You are assertive means respecting the ideas and needs of others and expecting the same in return. One strategy is to observe assertive people and mimic their actions. It’s not about playing a character you’re not. It’s taking cues from people you admire and allowing your true self to shine through.


  1. Begin by saying “no.”

People with poor self-esteem frequently feel compelled to say yes to others, even if they do not want to. You risk becoming overworked, resentful, angry, and depressed. Saying no does not usually cause problems in relationships. It may be beneficial to repeat expressing no differently until they understand.


  1. Make positive connections.

If particular people tend to depress you, try to spend less time with them or express your feelings about their comments or actions. Make an effort to form bonds with people who are positive and supportive of you.


  1. Be kind to yourself.

When feeling self-critical, being kind to yourself is being patient with yourself. Consider what you would say to a buddy in the same scenario. We frequently give others better counsel than we do ourselves.


  1. Set a goal for yourself.

At times, we all feel apprehensive or afraid to do something. People with healthy self-esteem, on the other hand, do not let their negative feelings keep them from attempting new things or taking on new tasks. Make a goal for yourself, such as joining an exercise class or attending a social event. Getting your goals accomplished will boost your self-esteem.


Where to get treatment for low self-esteem

Counselling or cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT) are psychological therapies that can help. Look for a local psychological therapy service. If you choose, you can speak with a doctor, who will refer you. A private therapist is another option. Make sure they’re a member of a professional organisation.



Low self-esteem affects your ability to achieve goals, form healthy relationships, and feel good about yourself. Poor self-esteem can sometimes damage your ability to be happy and perhaps make you more susceptible to mental health issues like anxiety and depression. It may take some time and work to change your perspective of yourself, but you should learn to see and love yourself for who you are over time.



To speak with any of our counsellors at Light House Counselling, call or WhatsApp +2348055507808.

We provide 5 different types of Counseling ranging from Marriage and Family Counselling, Educational Counselling, Rehabilitation Counselling, Mental Health Counselling, and Substance Abuse Counselling.

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