HOW TO IMPROVE YOUR SELF-WORTH AND SELF-ESTEEM
The existence of Man is characterized by growth, changes, and challenges. The ability to cope with these challenges is a function of the values one has. Values play an important role in daily living because they are guidelines that shape one’s way of life.
However, values could be inculcated by parents during upbringing, or sometimes adults cultivate the habit themselves as necessitated by conditions.
In essence, changing a bad character of an individual requires as much energy as inculcating a good character. For this reason, it is necessary to build good values at the early stage of one’s life. Although other factors outside an individual could influence the values a person has, the individual remains the sole authority over his or her quality of values. Some of these external factors are parents/family, religion, societal background, educational background, friends, and peer group.
Good values include honesty, obedience, integrity, self-esteem, and self-worth. As such, this article is written to highlight the values of self-esteem and self-worth, as well as educate readers on how these values could be built.
What Is Self-Esteem?
Self-esteem is an attribute that assesses the evaluation of oneself based on strengths and weaknesses others see. This is a very important individual attribute as it influences decisions, actions, and the entirety of your existence. One fact remains that self-esteem is a mindset that is manifested physically. The self-esteem of an individual does not have a relationship with an introverted or extroverted lifestyle.
Self-esteem is in forms; one could have low self-esteem. A person with low self-esteem is one whose mindset is characterized by individual negativity. Such a person has lost the trust in his/her ability to carry out tasks, does not believe in opinions and ideas they have, they have subjected everything to chance, and above all presumed failure in cases they could have at least attempted.
On the other hand, there also exists healthy self-esteem. Self-esteem does not need to be too high but at the level of being healthy. Persons that fall into this category are said to exhibit a certain level of confidence in the things they do. They trust in at least attempting and are not afraid of failure; because they are confident in their ability to succeed eventually.
In essence, characteristics of healthy self-esteem include resilience, confidence, the ability to speak up, sustaining relationships, etc. It is important to note that certain factors could have contributed to it before one exhibits low or healthy self-esteem. Some of these factors are
It is so unfortunate that society places an age range within which some achievements should be achieved. In situations when the target isn’t met, one could feel intimidated by contemporaries, and their self-esteem could reduce.
- Feedback and experiences of failure
The experiences one has, coupled with feedback from others, could diminish an individual’s self-esteem.
- Disability or illness
They are some injuries or illnesses that leave scars of disability on people. Imagine somebody involved in an auto crash, and the effect is fully evident in the person’s walking style. Such a person is bound to feel less confident or less self-esteemed. Other factors are the individual’s mindset, social media influences, and societal status.
What Is Self-Worth?
Self-worth is the way you rate yourself, outside of what others see or do. It is the recognition of your value. Self-worth is derived from your realization that you have the capacity to make a positive impact. As such, you believe in the need to be relieved of unnecessary suffering, have a sense of belonging, and be offered opportunities to realize your potential.
Self-Esteem Vs Self-Worth
Self-esteem is based on your achievements and what others see, therefore, it is bound to fluctuate. While achievements, comparisons, etc., are all inconsequential to self-worth. Self-worth is in-built and only needs to be discovered, while self-esteem is in on the basis of certain factors.
How to build your self-esteem and self-worth
- Set standards for yourself
In order to achieve your self-worth, you need to set standards for yourself. The problem that has resulted in many people having low self-esteem is the fact that they allow their friends, associates at work, and most especially the society to set standards for them. This doesn’t seem right and will obviously lead to low self-esteem. Therefore, set your goals, principles, and standards, targeting them one after the other. This is not to say that one must give up easily or chicken out.
- Avoid comparison
Once your standards have been set, strategize on ways to effectively lead to achieving your goal. Don’t try to do things in a particular way as influenced by others because what works for them may not work for you. Also, some parents have failed in this regard by comparing their wards. It’s important to know that no two individuals can exactly be the same, hence, wanting one child to be like the other will certainly affect the self-esteem and self-worth of that child.
- Keep good company
The friends one keeps contribute to his or her self-esteem. Keep company with people who encourage you in times of weakness, rather than those who negatively criticize you and mock you for your flaws.
- Be honest and diligent
Being a person of honesty and diligence makes you confident in your opinions, ideas, and judgment. With this confidence, you remain at peace with yourself and, therefore can give an honest assessment of yourself for improvement.
- Forgive yourself and move on
In life, some experiences may make one ashamed. In such situations, try and move on, forgive yourself, and keep trying. In whatever you do, don’t let your past be a hindrance to attempting your future.
What is a man without self-worth? A man without self-worth is a man without self-esteem. A man without self-esteem is as good as not living at all. Therefore, live your life, be at peace with yourself, celebrate your achievements, work on your flaws, and build your self-esteem accordingly.
To speak with any of our counsellors at Light House Counselling, call or whatsapp +2348060286476.
We provide 5 different types of Counseling ranging from Marriage and Family Counselling, Educational Counselling, Rehabilitation Counselling, Mental Health Counselling, and Substance Abuse Counselling.
We have professionals and we provide affordable services.