TYPES OF SELF-ESTEEM
One of the crucial determinants of success or failure in our lives is self-esteem. It influences the choices we make, so it is very important. The type of self-esteem we have determines how motivated we are in life. A lot of scholars and psychologists have talked about different types of self-esteem, and in this article, we will be taking a look at some of them below.
- HIGH SELF-ESTEEM
Having high self-esteem means you love yourself and accept who you are. It means you believe in your abilities and have the confidence that whatever challenges come your way, you will be able to overcome them.
High self-esteem helps you to form meaningful and healthy relationships with others. It gives you the feeling of always wanting to be ahead. High self-esteem makes you want to dare to try new things and experiences.
With high self-esteem, you tend to have a positive self-image and strength so that you do not think any less of yourself, even when you fail at tasks. High self-esteem removes your fear of failure, making you appear humble, cheerful, and a joy to be around. It allows you to acknowledge your mistakes and gives you the strength you need to achieve your goals.
TRAITS OF PEOPLE WITH A HIGH SELF-ESTEEM
- Firstly, people with high self-esteem firmly believe in certain values and principles and are always ready to defend them even when finding opposition. In other words, they generally feel secure about themselves and the things they do.
- Secondly, they trust their judgment and do not feel guilty when others do not like their choice.
- Thirdly, they do not lose time worrying excessively about what happened in the past or what may happen in the future. They learn from the past and plan for the future but live in the present.
- Fourthly, these people consider themselves equal in dignity to others, rather than inferior or superior; they also accept differences in talents, prestige, or financial standings of each individual they come across. They fully trust their problem-solving capacity, not hesitating after failures and difficulties.
- High self-esteem also has somewhat of a negative side. It could also mean you have no second thoughts about hurting other people in pursuit of the success you desire if you feel it will bring you happiness. Also, you may find yourself resisting working with others and may only collaborate with others if it seems appropriate or convenient. High self-esteem could also mean a need for repeated praise from others to maintain a positive view of themselves.
- INFLATED SELF-ESTEEM
If you have inflated self-esteem, you probably will not have the time to listen to other people’s opinions or take their advice. Having inflated self-esteem will lead you to constantly blame others, undervalue them, and adopt a hostile attitude and behavior towards others.
Most psychologists believe that for an individual with an inflated self-esteem, bragging camouflages their incompetence and their fear of rejection and failure. Individuals with inflated self-esteem are often viewed as being narcissistic due to the inflated view of self-worth that they have. According to Robert Raskin’s book “40 items true or false”, individuals with inflated self-esteem may consider these statements true, like “if I ruled the world, it would be a much better place.”
- LOW SELF-ESTEEM
Low self-esteem makes you think of yourself as below average. It will make you may not have confidence in yourself and not trust in your abilities or place value on yourself. You may tend to be very critical of yourself and depend on the approval and praise of others when evaluating your self-worth. Some may measure their likability in terms of success; some may accept themselves if they succeed and reject themselves when they fail.
People who have low self-esteem are at a higher risk of experiencing psychotic disorders. Low self-esteem can affect your life in the following ways:
- Bad relationships
Low self-esteem ruins your relationships with others because of self-doubt and the belief that you are not good enough to have anything of value. It could lead you to go to great lengths to please people because you want to be accepted; sometimes, it may be the wrong type of person. Low self-esteem could lead you to be always heavily criticised and dissatisfied with yourself.
Addiction to hard drugs and alcohol is likely to be your habit if you are dealing with low self-esteem. You may use it as an escape, which may be harmful to you due to its detrimental effects.
- Depression and anxiety
Dealing with low self-esteem may also mean you have to deal with a lot of depression and anxiety, and this causes a lot of sadness, worry, and fear. It could also cause hypersensitivity to criticism, resentment against the critics, and a feeling of being attacked. This may be backed up by chronic indecision and an exaggerated fear of errors.
Low self-esteem eventually leads to pessimism, envy, hostility towards others, and general defensiveness and irritability without any proximate cause. It makes you see temporary setbacks as permanent or an intolerable condition.
Different factors contribute to influencing the type of self-esteem you have, such as genetics, personality, life experiences, thoughts, age, health, comparing yourself to others, social circumstances, and your reaction to others.
In most cases, if you feel secure with your family, if you feel loved, and your needs are met, you tend to develop high self-esteem. For instance, like a baby, when you were learning to walk, you fell down the first few times, but with the encouragement you got from your family and those around you, you developed the confidence to keep trying until you got it right.
However, no type of self-esteem is indestructible, and due to certain situations or circumstances in life, you can fall from one level of self-esteem to another (high self-esteem to low self-esteem) and also rise from one self-esteem to another (low self-esteem to high self-esteem).
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